Is My Penis Too Small?


November 3, 2014 by Jason Phillips


Who knows? I’ve not compared it with any others. I’m not a big fan of looking at them. I’ve seen some on pornos, but they probably hire big ones. I’ve accidentally seen some in real life, most of them flaccid and tiny.

Are you worried about how yours looks? This is a wide spread mental ailment these days. Not physical, but mental. Physically, no matter what the shape or size, it will still probably achieve it’s purpose. The woman’s G Spot is 2 inches up inside. So if your penis is under 2” erect, then you’re in trouble – unless you substitute your micro-penis for a finger or a toe or something. But you will probably still be able to impregnate her. And you will still be able to urinate. Therefore, as long as your manhood protrudes somewhat, it should be sufficient to do all you need it to do. Saying that, the average penis size according to NHS direct (yeah i phoned them to ask) is between 4” and 6”. Don’t worry that is erect.

When your willy is flaccid it can shrink to all sorts of shapes and sizes, depending on how cold it is, how tired you are, your mental state and what drugs you have been boshing. Also there is the phenomena of the Show-er vs the Grower. A shower looks big when flaccid, but doesn’t grow much when hard. If you have a grower, obviously it may look a little shrivelled, but surprises everyone when its time to stand to attention.

Regardless of all of this many men are still fixated on the size of their penis. They seem to obsess over it not being ‘right’. The added pressure of pornos displaying big fat veiny cocks, and women’s seemingly overall vocal consensus that ‘size matters’ does nothing to help men’s self esteem. And so penis enlargement is a massive industry.

A lovely chap recently proposed to his girlfriend at a televised basket ball game. She said NO, on camera. It was uploaded to youtube. 10 million views in 4 days. And it hit the news. To add insult to inujry when he asked her why, she said “your penis is too small.”

Unhung Hero is a cockumentary made by ‘pickle dick’ Patrick Moote, and follows his mental torture following these events. He decides he wants to increase his penis size so that he can be happy. He travels the world looking for a solution. He takes the tablets, pumps his penis, does some ‘jelqin’, hangs some weights off it and then………


He has a total mental collapse and wants to call the entire film off. He feels the whole world is laughing at him and his tiny dick. Then a total breakthrough upon meting a gay chap. This guy was was totally cool with his partner’s small todger, the only problem was, his partner wasn’t. And his partner’s constant dissatisfaction with his own penis, and constant obsessive complaining drove them apart.

I could relate on many levels, not with the tiny cock thing, my misses measured mine and it’s above average – for a hobbit. But i could relate with the whole idea of being dissatisfied with ourselves, or parts of ourselves. I always struggled with my appearance, and have been cripplingly shy through-out my life because of it. Only helped by excessive drink and other forms of escape. I unfortunately did go through with some dodgy surgery, which i now regret. I regret it because it didn’t fix the problem. The problem was not external. And when Pickle Dick was waiting for his surgery i found myself shouting at the screen, “NOOOOOOOO DON’T DO IT!”

Happiness does not come about from changing ourselves externally. It comes from accepting ourselves, and learning to work with what we have. The most attractive people are the ones who accept themselves most outrageously. That is charisma.

‘Celebrate your wrong bits’ is a phrase i came up with a few years ago, and i struggle every day to live by it.


18 thoughts on “Is My Penis Too Small?

  1. Flapsandwich says:

    must learn to wiggle the worm. or shake the maggot. or ruffle the amoeba


  2. Nadanay says:

    Yeah,its not how deep you go but how you wiggle the worm! Acually I prefer a worm over a snake. There is such a thing as too big and it’s not fun and can mean no action at all.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Flapsandwich says:

    yeah its tough one. i can speak from experience, and say without doubt, that surgery made my happiness levels Drop! But would like a wider scope on how its worked out for others.


  4. You conclude brilliantly and inspirationally: “Happiness does not come about from changing ourselves externally. It comes from accepting ourselves, and learning to work with what we have. The most attractive people are the ones who accept themselves most outrageously. That is charisma.” Though I do feel rather a hypocrite in that I may well put myself as a candidate for surgery… That compulsion to alter the body can be overwhelming, and I would not know where to begin to fight it.


  5. how to be more accepting? I think it is just obstinate will power! Refuse to get pissed off at things you should quite rightly be allowed to be pissed off at. Focus all your anger onto things you can change or into ingenious methods of how you can make stuff change for the better instead of wasting time on the stuff that you can’t- the stuff you just have to accept as shitty and move on because then it will be in the past. Dissatisfaction is not a bad thing – but it should result in action not depression. Live in the clouds. Remain relentlessly positive because it is much better than the alternative. Sometimes though you need to have a bloody good rant/cry/three day alcohol binge to get whatever is bugging your system out of it before you can move on and the trick is not to beat your self-up over it. Emotion, especially dissatisfaction should never be bottled up. Oh hang on – I forgot we were talking about cock size not life! Well the same applies…. 😉


  6. Flapsandwich says:

    ACCPETANCE is definitely the way. if you know how to be more accepting then please share with me, as my default state seems to be DISSATISFIED! thanks very much for the comment. x

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I have a big nose and small boobs. I have dumped men for having small penises and I have dumped men with big ones for not knowing what the fuck to do with them. I’m sure I have not got a date with other men because of my above mentioned physical features. Now I am older. The men I date are older. We all give less of a shit. Why? Because we are enlightened that physical features are not what counts but personality? Because you get to a certain age and you just settle for what you can get? who knows…. But definitely you will be a happier human being if you settle with what your lot is and someone out there will love you for that and being you, which is surely better than someone loving you for your size of sexual organs. Conversely there is no need to feel guilty to want to change something physical about yourself if you could. That is human nature – to strive for perfection – to be influenced by social stereotypes. Accept this also and you will be some way towards some kind of confusing happiness….

    Liked by 1 person

  8. welshyid says:

    Haha its me. Craig.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Flapsandwich says:

    cheers. who are you? x


  10. welshyid says:

    If you’re ever worried about the size of your penis Bryn, remember this. When you pick your nose the whole finger goes in and touches the sides, put a blade of grass inside your nose and it tickles, do women/girls/cock hungry sluts/ladies like to be tickled or be full !!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Wez G says:

    It’s not the size of the vessel, it’s all about the motion in the ocean…


  12. Caroline shand says:

    Nice to know that men also have body “wobbles”. It’s not how big but what you do with it. And practice makes perfect

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Anonymous says:

    Well it seems that sometimes the sexes aren’t so opposite after all. After years of large boobs and all the social/antisocial attention they created and the physical pain i endured daily. I went for a reduction. Best thing I ever did. As a woman it comforts me to know that behind the male bravado, you guys also have your body issues. For me my mantra was “it’s not the size that counts but what you do with it” as with all things in life practice makes perfect.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Flapsandwich says:

    interesting! will check out the book thanks


  15. Ele Bell says:

    There’s actually a lot of debate over whether or not there is such a thing as a ‘g-spot’ at all.

    And it is widely acknowledged that the majority of women do not reach orgasm through intercourse alone, and usually need a little extra ‘help’.

    For any men reading this who are paranoid about their ability to pleasure their female partners, this book is a great place to start…!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Flapsandwich says:

    originally i had the exact dimensions in the post. but i couldnt bring myself to allow everyone to know!!! i bottled it!


  17. Anonymous says:

    One thing I found amusing: in spite of all your rationality on the subject, you *still* found it necessary to point out that your girlfriend measured your penis and found it to be above average. That’s not a criticism, by the way, but it definitely does show just how desperately vulnerable men’s egos are in relation to this subject. “It doesn’t matter if your willy is small…BUT MINE ISN’T, BY THE WAY, THAT’S NOT WHAT I’M SAYING…”

    Liked by 1 person

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